How to be Happier: A Small Guide to Improve Daily Happiness
Emptiness has been something that has affected me throughout my life. A feeling of apathy, nihilism, and overall indifference towards my experiences and life. A hollow feeling found in my chest in which I am neither sad or happy but simply indifferent. I don’t even know how to describe it other than just not caring about anything that has just occurred good or bad. Simply the inability to enjoy accomplishment or personal joy. Every high is met with an apathetic response from within as I am unable to even care about my own accomplishments or experiences. Its like I don’t know how to feel; it seems I lack a personal assessment for what I desire and what is exciting. Most of the times I don’t know whether I should feel excited or not until someone else is excited for me and I realized, “Oh I should be excited about this.” Emptiness like every other feeling, is also simply a feeling, something that comes and goes. No matter how much I achieve it seems to always comeback and puts thoughts in my head such as “Who cares? Why are you trying so hard? Nobody Cares?”. Sometimes I let these thoughts win and they pull me to the dark side of apathy in which I question why bother trying, and will things get better.
Well I know for sure things get better, because they have. Graduating college has done wonders for me. No longer do I slave away for assignments and grades that bring no fulfillment other than the hope that my efforts now will bring me happiness in the future. I am no longer in the naïve world of university, filled with constant negative dialogue and self-diagnosis of depression and various other mental illnesses. I am no longer surrounded by negative people with limiting beliefs, I hope to never see again. I am no longer surrounded by people who think going out and blacking out is fun. I finally have time to think for myself and understand what the real world is like, and what I truly desire.
Being back home as been a blessing. I am now back in an environment in which I am constantly surrounded by people who want to do more, and do better in all aspects of life. I have fulfilling discussions with my parents as well as homies about life and our goals. I have the time and mental capacity to do what I want and enjoy it as well. I have taken on more responsibility and have thus started to gain PURPOSE.
Purpose is the antidote to emptiness. Purpose is the reason why you wake up each morning and work hard in achieving your goals and dreams. Many people lack purpose and I cannot blame them as I was once in their position. My purpose right now is to keep growing and working towards my goals to ensure to better future for myself, my friends, and my family. Purpose changes constantly and we have different purposes in various aspects our lives. I am still reflecting upon this and my purpose will change in the future
However a quicker solution to living more happier and fulfilling lives is:
- Taking on more responsibility
- Positive Discomfort
- Hobbies
Taking Responsibility
As coming back from college I have been taking on more and more responsibility. This does not mean doing more mindless work for someone else, but taking on responsibility for my life and my actions. I have been taking on more chores at home and have been helping out my family when I am able to, either by washing dishes, doing laundry, or taking out the trash. I have been taking responsibility for my own health and well-being by looking into resources and positive habits that I can implement. Other small responsibilities we can take on can be getting a houseplant that only you take care of, picking up siblings from school, or getting a pet. I am no longer a victim and saying “Life sucks, it is so hard” but now am saying, “ I am responsible for my own happiness and well-being, what can I do to improve that?” Along with this website I have many other projects in the works and that will come out soon (HINT NEW MUSIC: Demon Time dropping October 21st on all streaming platforms). As of now I have more to do and more to fill my day up with, I no longer have the time to ponder the emptiness as it doesn’t really come up anymore.
Positive Discomfort
Life right now is too easy, and the way we gain meaning and purpose is by suffering or rather suffering about things that we care about. Positive discomfort is taking on challenges that lead to growth not self-destruction. Positive discomfort can be achieved by working out, having difficult conversations with loved ones, waking up early, taking cold showers, leaning into your fears, and by taking on an overwhelming schedule. Since modern technology’s entire purpose is to remove discomfort, our lives are becoming meaningless. That is why by engaging in positive discomfort can feel so good. After an intense workout I feel amazing, after a cold shower I feel amazing, after waking up early and getting sunlight I feel amazing. Right now I am the most happiness and fulfilled I have ever been. With these steps please implement one at a time and go slow. You want to build positive and sustainable habits which take time and patience to get right. Try stuff out, reflect upon it, see what works and what doesn’t and go from there.
Hobbies
Hobbies are basically stuff you do that has no productive output other than fun. I play magic because its fun, I go climbing because its fun, I cook because its fun, I read One piece because its fun, I read fiction because its fun. We need hobbies and we need to have fun EVERY SINGLE DAY. Too many people are obsessed with procrastinating on fun and happiness, “Telling themselves I haven’t earned it or I don’t deserve to have fun.” Life is all about balance. We have to work hard and play hard. What is the point of working hard if you never get to celebrate it or if you have fun everyday then it no longer becomes fun as it becomes normal. We need hobbies to balance our lives out and feed our souls. I tell you to schedule “fun time” every single day. If you have a busy schedule then wake up an hour earlier to do your hobby. Set aside time to paint, set aside time to watch your favorite tv show, set aside time to go ice skating. You have to see fun as being essential and setting aside time for it, because without fun life is meaningless.
Thank you so much for reading this long article/short guide on my take on how live more happy and fulfilling lives. Let’s grow together 🙂